I can’t even count the number of times I’ve heard students say, “But, why aren’t you doing the postures, too? … Why aren’t you on your mat practicing with us?” We constantly are asked the question as to why we don’t demonstrate during classes; and quite frankly, our yoga teacher trainees were very intrigued at first, too. If you attend a yoga class at The Yoga Haven or you’re interested in participating in our upcoming yoga teacher training program, one of the first things you’ll see or hear is we do not demonstrate nor practice for the entire duration of our classes. We utilize cues through words and walk around the room watching and supporting students as though we are just another prop in the room. But, why?

Yoga is about connection. Not connection to the outside world. Not connection to the stimuli that electronics create. It’s not about social media and self-promotion. Yoga is about connecting, intentionally to the mind, to the body, to the breath... to the individual. Yoga is about creating a safe space for students to put down the armor, soften the grip on the sword, and to really explore as it serves the student on any given day. How can we expect students to feel safe and to explore the teachings of yoga if we don’t support those efforts?

The other day, a student said to me she visited the studio’s website for the first time and was pleasantly surprised by how easy it was to navigate. This turned into a conversation about what small business ownership entails and who is behind all of the administration portion of The Yoga Haven. Sure, you might go to class and see the teacher at the front of the room, but what about the other stuff?

I have been blessed with the incredible privilege of protecting your time and space for a measly one hour per week. Four percent of a single day. You carve time out of your busy schedule to reconnect with yourself… to deliberately and intentionally craft a practice meant to balance the frenetic pace of daily life. I cannot tell you as a 'teacher' [when in all reality, I'm just a fellow student] how precious that is - to watch you enter the studio with the weight of the world on your shoulders… only to witness you melt into your body during savasana… only to reenter the world more evenly distributed and serene.

”Say what you mean, and mean what you say.” These words ring deeply into my ears. Some days, I wake up and wonder if I’ve thanked you enough. Some days, I go to sleep and wonder if you truly understand how humbled I am to be in this community. Some days, I ponder over my morning cup of joe wondering if I’m merely a robot and the words aren’t resonating. Some days, as I lay my sweet girls down to sleep, I wonder if I’m living in a dream. But above all, every single day, I see you. I see you on social media commenting and interacting. I see you in the studio inbox inquiring about how to get started. I see you showing up for classes and special events. I see you bringing more ideas and plans into my giant binder of future opportunities. I see you chatting with friends about your experience. I see you waiting for class to begin as you mingle with everyone around, and I see you waiting while merely observing the crowd. I see you. Every single one of you. I see you, and I’m slowly realizing that if you say what you mean and you mean what you say… the words resonate.
… and because of you, we have ….. Exciting news….

It has taken quite some time for me to process my recent trip to Kripalu Center for Yoga and Health in Stockbridge, MA. However, due to increased requests, I decided laying out my experience would be beneficial not only for me, but hopefully for some of the readers. I keep circling back to these two very specific words when I process my experience. Received and Validation. Received…. and Validation. What does that even mean?

Nothing irks me more than coming up from savasana at the end of the yoga class and hearing the teacher at the front of the room say, “So, how was it?” Ok, maybe that’s a bit of an exaggeration; but, ugh does that phrase get under my skin. How often do you attend a new yoga class or a class you’ve been regularly attending that the teacher switched up a bit, and you hear them ask how it was at the end of class? Are you one of those students that feels obligated whether the teachers asks or not to comment on the class? Where does that stem from and why does it need to change?

As I’ve said in other blogs before, one of my most used taglines is “…. if it serves you today.” I find myself in every single class repeating this phrase over and over again. Sometimes I worry I’m coming across as a robot saying the same thing, trying my best to see it resonate in each and every student within the studio walls. But every time those words come out of my mouth, chills go down my spine. It’s resonating. It never gets old. I will never stop saying it. But, what does it even mean?

In this moment, no words of my own encapsulate the humbled, healing feelings I hold within my heart in this very moment. I merely come to you today to share an excerpt written by Corina Luna Dea as a call to action in Archaeology for the Woman’s Soul. I invite you, today, to open your own heart to these words and breathe it in.

The more I get the opportunity to guide students through this beautiful movement piece of the practice, the more opportunities I get to see and watch people explore the body. But, it seems no matter how many times I fight the narrative, I still hear people use the phrases, “Am I doing this right?” “How do I get my body to move like hers?” “What’s the advanced version of such & such pose?” “Is this how it should be?” As a society, we’ve been trained to wait for people to tell us what to do and to reinforce if what we are doing is correct. We’ve been trained to be creative, but in the sense of following rules or adhering to a specific need. We’ve been trained to recognize if something is right or wrong.

When I finally decided I was in a place in life able to open and maintain a yoga studio, I pulled out my computer and frantically started writing out my business plan. That was the easy part. I had been inspired by many mentors in my teaching experience, and I knew exactly how I wanted my own studio to operate and function. I breezed through the business plan deciding when to hold classes, when to offer special events, pricing options, payroll for teachers, everything business was typed out in a six-page document ready for my husband and business partner to edit and approve. “But, what are you going to name it?” Um what?

Yoga Alliance. It’s a term spread throughout the yoga community, and you hear some yoga teachers mention it quite often. You might even see yoga teachers refer to themselves as registered yoga teachers (RYT), but what is it and what does that even mean? In my own words, Yoga Alliance is an organization that created standards for the yoga community; and, in order to become registered with the organization, teachers and/or yoga schools must uphold and abide by these standards. Not to mention, teachers and/or schools must pay an annual fee to be able to use the name. Yoga Alliance is the world’s most popularly recognized yoga organization, internationally known for its membership credibility guide.

I never realized impostor syndrome even existed until I heard a friend talking about her own experience one day. It was like a light switched flipped on inside of my brain, and I thought to myself, “Oh, crap. That’s it!” Impostor syndrome! What even is it anyway? According to Wikipedia (because that’s a reliable source this day and age, yeah?), impostor syndrome is a “Psychological pattern in which people doubt their accomplishments and have a persistent, often internalized fear of being exposed as a ‘fraud.’”

It took me quite a long time to come to the realization that it’s ok for my body to continue to change over time. When I started my yoga practice, I was at the beginning of a health journey to begin loving myself again and getting into great physical shape after having my first two children. I had only known and understood the body that I had all of my life. Pregnancy and birth definitely changed my body tremendously and it was like I was living inside of an alien. It took some time to understand how I moved, how I looked, and how I felt.

We all strive to be better human beings. As a part of society, most of us do not like ourselves and we approach the yoga practice as a way to get better – to fix ourselves. We move the body to lose weight, to get stronger, to find flexibility. Most people come to yoga classes with a physical goal in mind. It is my objective to change how this community views not only the yoga teacher; but the yoga practice in general.

It all begins with a dream, right? Or at least that’s what society tells me. Each time I start a new beginner yoga series, it never fails that a student asks how I became a yoga teacher. More importantly, how did I even become a student? The answer isn’t as complex as you might think. I had a notion that yoga was “too calming” or “too zen” for anyone like me. You see, I have anxiety, ADHD, and most days I feel like a hot mess. No, most days I am a hot mess.